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Wednesday 26 July 2017

WALT write a litter using a character description


First I plan my writing, then Sally made me add more details. Then I wrote my letter.

I learned to revise and edit my writing

The easy thing was the writing because it had a plan. and the hard thing was the re reading it.



Kai ora Matua
Kei te pehea koe? Dad It is me your son in the sky it is very cold up here it is cold like snow. I can’t play rugby because there are no rugby field or a rugby ball up in the sky. I get real hungry up here, there is no food. I miss your hugs. I feel sad because you are not around. In the dark, at night, when I am sleeping I curl up into a ball to keep me warm I put my jumper on to make me evey warmer.


I moan when it’s cold up here, I also sob. I’m so annoyed about how he chucked me up in the sky. He put his hands on his hip and his face was angry, his fega point at me and his nors fler and he yelled at me. He is ugly like a troll and his fart are small and he got a  snot nose. His arms are like banana, he got hole clothes and his body is fat and quesnel to. his eyebrows are bushy and he got a monobrow. His mouth is like a banana too. His eyes are big like balls.
here is my plan.

Leave me a comment.

2 comments:

  1. Wow Mana,

    I can really picture your Uncle Tane. You have used a very rich description in your writing. Next time, you might want to get some help with your spelling editing. Well done Mana, I also understand how your character feels because I have lots of information about what it's like in the sky.
    Keep up the good work!

    ReplyDelete
  2. you have a couple errors brrrr

    ReplyDelete

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